Open relationship

An open relationship or open marriage is a non-monogamous relationship–free union or marriage respectively–, where both parties make it up to each other to have intimate relationships outside of the couple, without considering this as infidelity (that is, a consensual non-monogamous relationship).

The open relationship can be seen as the intermediate state between the traditional relationship (monogamy) and free love. However, the idiosyncrasy of each open relationship is defined by the individuals involved. There is no set of rules or boundaries for an open relationship or marriage; each couple is unique in defining what works for them at any given time. Likewise, the rules are subject to change over time, as people and their relationships evolve. Many family therapists in these kinds of relationships embrace the idea that the key to the relationship, especially in an open marriage, is honesty and open communication between all parties involved. In an ethical sense, the parties usually make an explicit differentiation of the limits between the sexual and the affective when having a relationship on the outside; that is to say, that it is allowed to have sexual relations that go from something occasional to a stable bond of lovers, with one or more people, as long as there is no crush involved.

Types

An open relationship can be understood to mean almost any type of non-monogamous relationship, although polygamy or free love are not usually included. Within the different types of open relationships, it is worth distinguishing:

• Typical open relationship: the one established by a main couple whose two members consent to each other to maintain free sexual relations with third parties.
• Semi-open relationship or "monkeygamish": relationship mostly monogamous but in which some intimate relationships with third parties are allowed, with limitations on frequency or way.
• Hybrid relationship: one member may maintain relationships with third parties but the other may not.
• Swinging: the practice of couple exchange.
• Poliamor: the simultaneous practice of two or more romantic relationships, regardless of whether there is sex or not.

Reasons for and against

For a couple, establishing an open relationship regime is a decision in which various factors intervene, both for and against, and which will depend largely on the particular beliefs and circumstances of that couple. There is a separate debate both at an academic level (sexology) and at a popular level about the convenience or not of this type of relationship in general. Below are some of the pros and cons that are often voiced about it.

For

• The feeling of personal freedom and the possibility of living new loving adventures.
• Greater respect for the individuality of the person. Love should not involve possessing or chaining your partner.
• Greater mutual generosity. It stands before the enjoyment of your partner to the selfishness of loving her for yourself.
• We prevent jealousy that usually involves flirting and relationships with third parties when they are not consented.
• A greater solidity in the couple, compared to couples that crack or break as a result of unconsensual infidelity.
• Greater maturity and honesty in the couple; thoughts and feelings that would be hidden in a closed relationship are shared.
• It avoids falling into the routine of a monogamous couple. In fact the coexistence of other relationships can rekindle the flame of the main couple.
• For bisexuals who have a heterosexual partner relationship, it opens the possibility that such a party may have consensual sexual relations with persons of the same sex or vice versa; if it is a same-sex couple, it gives the opportunity to maintain heterosexual sexual relations.

Against

• The terms of the contract (the rules to respect) are more complex than in a monogamous relationship.
• Sometimes this agreement is used as a subterfuge to not break the couple, or one member accepts it only to satisfy the other.
• It is necessary a lot of confidence in themselves and in the couple not to suffer for jealousy.
• There may be problems if one partner has many secondary relationships and the other very few or none.
• Risk of acquiring sexually transmitted infections (STIs) if due precautions of safe sex are not taken.
• Possibility of having a child other than your partner for the case of heterosexual relationships in fertile age.
• Possibility of a strong emotional bond with one of the secondary couples.
• The social pressure for prejudices linked to the moral burden of promiscuity and being classified as promiscuous or lacking mental and emotional maturity, especially by social-conservative sectors. Even sick association with psychiatric pathologies whose symptoms can lead to promiscuous behaviors.

Marriage and Sex

The practice of extramarital affairs is often illegal in jurisdictions where adultery is illegal, regardless of whether the couple has given prior consent. Open marriage is not the same as polygamy, where sexual relations are held exclusively between the parties. An acronym used to describe an open marriage is MBA, which stands for Married But Available.

Organizations

Open relations (Argentina)